Instagram came on the scene and changed the game. Taking pictures AND editing them, AND posting them to a site instantly? Never been done before and was a brilliant concept but was limited to iOS. THEN they opened it up to Android users and my timeline swelled to massive proportions. I mean, I love it. Favorite celebrities? Followed. Beautiful women? Followed. Hipster Sneaker Shops? Yup, got them too.
But this opine isn’t about the glory days of beautiful people with camera phones. No, this is about the morons that don’t understand the purpose of the app. Today, is your lucky day, however, because I’m gonna lay out a few rules for you to remember so you can prosper online.
1. If you have bad skin, and/or out of proportion facial features LAYOFF 42 consecutive shots of your mug. Nobody wants to see it.
2. If you’re drunk, don’t post ANYTHING. Same rule applies to texting.
3. Tweegram is ridiculous. If u wanna send some words, use twitter.
4. Do NOT “like” your own pics; it’s totally ridiculous. Of course you like it, you posted it IDIOT.
5. Don’t abuse hash tags. You can rest assured no one is searching #dumpingonthesestupidbroads
6. Don’t be a stalker. If you never post, don’t like my pics. I’m gonna block you
These are just a few of the many many things that get you blocked on Instagram. If you listen to and apply these pointers, you will prosper in your posting.
Use your discretion,
Mr. H
Follow on twitter @thecropscream
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