If you’re like the average American, at some point in time, you have been let go from a job. Whether laid off, “asked” to resign, or outright terminated, you found yourself jobless. When you were young, let’s say 18, you may have looked at the situation and said “I didn’t like that job anyway. Now I have a little time off to focus on what I want to do!” Fast forward the same situation 10 years. You didn’t really care for the job and you’re underpaid. Your boss is a jerk and you are forced to work every other Saturday. You hate the job! But if they were to come in and tell you that your services are no longer needed you would be crushed. Why? Because a man’s self worth is inherently tied up in what he does for work. It’s an integral part of his identity. To be told, in essence “we dont want you” is a direct blow to his ego. It’s akin to getting dumped by a girl that you didn’t really even like.
It has been clinically noted than a man can go through depression and withdrawal after separation from work. He can become listless, tired, moody and even angry with his friends and family for no reason at all. It’s a life change. People (men especially) hate change. They prefer to be a creature of habit, to keep a set routine. No surprises. When you lose your source of income, the element of the unknown creeps right out from the darkness and parks in your driveway. “How am I gonna pay my rent?” ,”Is my girl gonna leave me?”, “What will my kids and friends think?”, and “Am I really worthless?” are very real and legit questions that he will have and that only he can answer.
The positive in all of this is: there is hope! Don’t focus on the job lost, focus on the opportunity gained! Have you ever heard someone say “necessity is the father of invention”? Well, they say that because it’s true. Many a successful person started a company because they were turned down or outcast from the establishment. Do you have a unique skill or passion? Why not see if you can make some money selling it? Sites like Pinterest and Instagram are chock full of entrepreneurs. Follow and contact them to see what inspired them. Try going to business development blogs like www.entrepreneurgarden.com for valuable tips on how to be successful working for yourself. In conjunction with those avenues, there’s always talking to people who have a business acumen that you respect and outright asking for pointers or connections to other people that may be hiring someone like you. USE YOUR RESOURCES. Make sure your resume is up to date and readily searchable in databases like LinkedIn , careerbuilder, and Monster and check local employment agencies for openings that fit your profile. Then MAKE A SCHEDULE. It’s impossible to spend every minute of every day looking for work; it’s also counter productive. You have to sprinkle in some recreation (think FREE recreation, like exercising) and plan to do it. Spend a little more time with your family. Select a book about something upbuilding a read it. Volunteer with a non profit or organization that you feel pushes a good cause. Use your new found “free” time to improve yourself. It sounds weird, but there really is more happiness in giving than receiving; so give of yourself to improve the environment of someone around you. You will feel a sense of accomplishment for sure.
No doubt about it, the unemployment line is not a line that any of us ever want to stand in, but stuff happens. We can’t always control our situations, but we can always control how we react to them. Since our goal is to keep our demeanor fresh, don’t get down on yourself. Get up, get out and start making moves! You might be surprised, one door closing could mean the opening of a bigger one.
Sincerely,
Mr. H
Follow on twitter @thecropscream @afreshdemeanor
Recent Comments